WoW vrs Life

This will probably be my most controversial post yet. Now remember, I'm not the type to fuel fires, slam anyone or otherwise stir up crap. But it's a topic that hits close to home for me and probably a lot of other gamers, regardless of the program you play. So keep this in mind before you read on, these are my views and they come from a fellow WoW "addict".

I use the term addict, though I don't use it lightly. I think for a large population of WoW players, we are all addicted in some way to the game we play.

Think about this. How many times have you done one of the following?

1. Passed up an RL invitation/obligation (i.e dinner date, party, family outing, trip to the movies, school event, a ball game, book club meeting, a once weekly night out with the guys/girls, hanging out with friends) for some game related reason (i.e raid night, needing to gain those last few bubbles to get that level, farming, running instances, etc)
2. Skipped work/school, for some game related reason (expansion release day, content patch day, just wanting to play)
3. Been late to an appointment/meeting/date because you had to finish the instance/raid that lasted longer then you had planned.
4. Sacrificed your sleep (ie stayed up all night or until the early hours of the morning) to play either because you lost track of time or because you knowingly did so without paying any mind to the following day being a school/work day (possibly leading to #2)
5. Lost track of time thus causing you to forget simple daily functions (ie, meals, laundry, household chores, trips to the grocery, etc)
6. Find that your time away from the game is still focused on the game? (ie, reading blogs, strategy, making plans, talking about the game?)

Now the question becomes how often do you do any or all of those things? Most people will begin to defend their actions here. I know I do. But I'm just as guilty of this things. It's called letting the game we love, run our life. And if I'm anywhere near close, I'd say you're reasoning's and defenses may include any one of the following:

1. I had a bad day/week, I use WoW to relax.
2. My family/spouse/partner/children/friends plays with me, so it's ok.
3. It's something I enjoy, just like anyone else's hobby. It's no different then the weekly night out with the guys or playing a sport.
4. The guild needed me, I can't abandon a raid/instance/guild run/etc.
5. Oh, I don't do that stuff very often.

Now, in part, most of those statements are true for a lot of people but now take a step back and look at yourself and your view on the game from an outside prospective. If you weren't the player, but the spouse/friend/child/parent of the player, how would you feel?

1. Do you do other things besides play? Do you spend time away from the game with your spouse, family, girlfriend/boyfriend, children, etc.
2. Is your family/spouse/partner/child/friend happy with the amount of time that you play the game together or on your own? Do you make time to do spend with them for other things?
3. It is just like any other hobby, I agree totally with this. But how much time is sunk into playing the game compared to other hobbies?
4. The guild does need you, you make a unspoken commitment when you queue for those instances, raids, etc. Are you planning for that? Making sure that the time you have isn't going to leech into other RL appointments, needs and responsibilities?
5. You don't do this stuff very often? If you can honestly say that and mean it, that's awesome!

Most of you know my history if you've been following my blog for any amount of time. Basically, Eto and I both play together. We met in the game 2 years ago, now are engaged and living together and are still playing the game. Together, we probably play about 30 hours or so a week. We're co-GM's to our guild, raid leaders and altaholics. We both work full time jobs. We are parents to my two boys 6 and 9 who live with us every other week, year around.

Now, do I say we play too much? No, not really. Do I say we fail on some of our other responsibilities? Am I one of the people that can say "Oh, I don't do that stuff very often", nope. Because I have been guilty of most of those things.

I'm a gamer yes and I'm the fiancee of a gamer. That's hard sometimes. Because even though we're both gamers, we both have feelings and sometimes those get hurt because we choose the game over each other. It's never on purpose, but it does happen. That's the reason I point these things out to you guys.

I think we have to make an extra effort to fit our real life commitments in with the game time we love so much. To keep a stable happy environment this is something we have to work on.

So I pose this challenge to you. Take a step back, look at the people and the life around you, are you balancing that out? Are the people around you happy? Are you happy? Look at those things long and hard because you don't have to loose them or your game, you just have to balance them together.

So how can you do that? There are a few simple things that you can do that will cause little to no impact on you:
1. Cut your game off an hour early every night, even 30 minutes early, and spend that time with your spouse or family or just get a little extra sleep.
2. Make a commitment to have a date with your family/spouse/friends/whoever, once every week. Even if that date is just time spent together at home, etc. Make time to do something with them at least once week.
3. Eat your meals together, away from the computer, tv, phone, etc.
4. Get out every once in a while. Like Blizzard says "Bring your friends to Azeroth but be sure to spend time outside Azeroth with them as well". Or something like that, the "tip" on the loading screen, even Blizzard knows how easy it is to loose yourself in their game.
5. Set aside time for your responsibilities. For Eto and I, it's early Saturday morning. The house work gets done, we start laundry, etc before we're allowed to play the game.

Just think about it and when in doubt ASK the people in your life, if they have complaints, then there is honestly probably reason for you to worry some. Don't stop what you enjoy but alter a little. Life only happens once, don't let it totally pass you by.

Flame away....

No really, feel free to comment good or bad, what do you guys think about your life vrs WoW?